Quiet the chaos: On mental health and building community through fundraising

When I first got my diagnosis of bipolar illness, I felt ashamed about it and I didn’t tell anyone. But it became increasingly clear that I was hurting my husband and my two children by not getting help. It wasn’t enough for me just to go to therapy and see a psychiatrist; I had to get more help and I had to get it fast. So, I signed up for a NAMI support group and convinced my husband to get involved with NAMI, too. If we hadn’t found NAMI when we did, it was clear that our family would have fallen apart.

I also started going to the Quaker Meeting every Sunday and got involved with meditation and other spiritual practices. I sought out people in the Quaker Meeting who seemed centered and wise, and I slowly learned how to quiet the chaos that was within me and all around me. I made a list of about ten people who told me I could call them if I felt like taking my own life. These became the spiritual friends who inspired me and led me through my journey of how to fundraise for other people like me, who need extra support.

I took several professional jobs as a fundraiser that promoted wonderful values and community activities: Wild Swan Theater, Ann Arbor School for the Performing Arts, and Jazzistry. During this time, I was also working as a freelance magazine journalist. My favorite pieces to write are works of creative nonfiction, which you’ll see published in the Ann Arbor-based Crazy Wisdom Journal beginning in September while I am living in France for the next year.

The main advice I would give someone who wants to begin a meaningful fundraising journey is to make a list of all the people who saved your life when you were really, really sick. Don’t ask them for money first. Say thank you. Say Hey, you might not remember me, but I was the one who had really bad depression, and you helped me through it by giving me a smile. You changed my life. 

Be honest about your ask and be grateful about your why. Tell them that you are participating in a walk for NAMI and ask if they could spare a little something. Or maybe ask if they might let their coworkers or friends know that you could use some support. Tell them how their assistance impacted you, how their actions made you feel, how they saved your life. Tell them how you want to pass this goodness along, too. In the end, that’s really what it’s all about.

Most importantly, don’t get all caught up in competition. I raised a lot of money because I’m 64! You’ll be able to raise a lot of money when you’re 64, too. Or maybe even before that. The important thing is— stay in the game. Don’t get discouraged, and help others stay in the game, too. We’re all in this together!